Building a soulmate
The day I am writing this is actually Andrew's 20th birthday- and on top of that, yesterday we had our first look and bridal pictures, so I am feeling all the feels. Most of those said feels being gratitude and love. I am seriously overflowing.
Lately, with the wedding and moving into the apartment, I’ve been learning more and more about relationships. Before I begin, I want to talk a little about soulmates. I do believe in them 1000%. I believe in friend soulmates and romantic soulmates. I believe that every single relationship- whether it was good or not- is necessary for our future. I know personally that I have grown SO SO much because of the relationships I have had in the past. And I am so confident that me and Andrew were bound to meet from the beginning. Everything was just too lucky for it to not be "fate". The night we met, I wasn't even supposed to be there; I was supposed to be on a DATE with a DIFFERENT BOY but he cancelled (how rude I know, but it's okay because I met my husband). Another coincidence that is so mind boggling to me is that a whole year before we knew each other even existed, we were at the same concert, in the same spot, only separated by a middle part in the crowd. And it might not sound like much but it is just the little things like that that prove again and again that although timing is so mysterious, it is always right. If we had met earlier, I can't say that we would have ended up together. But we were lucky enough to be introduced at just the right time.
We clicked right away. You can ask anyone that knows us, we became inseparable the second we met. I wish I could explain the feeling better, but everyone is so right when they say "when you know, you know", because it really is that confident of a feeling. If there is any doubt the relationship of your present might not actually be your forever, then it probably isn't. But that doesn't mean they aren't A soulmate. Again, emphasizing "A" soulmate. Everyone has more than one soulmate, but when you meet your forever person- it's different. But it isn't all easy. This forever person is A soulmate, but they have to be worked on to become THE soulmate of your lifetime.
Let me explain, relationships take work- yes. They wouldn't last without work. Every "perfect" couple still has their moments and bumps, but what is important is how those little bumps are dealt with. Do you become a team and learn from them? Or do they repeat without end and you feel pitted against each other?
This type of love and communication takes soooo so much practice. It can be painful. It will consist of trial and error. But then when the next bump comes, you guys are a team and have a game plan. There was this quote I saw once that really stuck with me. It went something like "When you and your significant other fight, it is important to remember that the problem at hand is the enemy- not each other". I think keeping this in mind during fights helps mend any space and bitterness that may have been there. It makes it easier to admit you are sorry, because you are no longer trying to defend yourself- but you are trying to defend your relationship from whatever is hurting it.
I didn't mean to step on here and go all relationship therapist on ya, but these thoughts have been so present in my mind as my life has been changing so much recently. I know people see me and Andrew as so young and maybe a little bit silly for getting married at this age. But I am so proud to call Andrew my forever. I am so lucky to have such a strong partner to face life with. I am so sure of myself and of us as a team. And I have learned so much from him, and how our difference compliment and teach each other (those stories are going to have to be a whole other post). I love our love. And I am more than willing to talk about it and show it off until everyone and their dog can find someone as kind and loving and ridiculous as Andrew.
Anyway, happy birthday my love <3 I am beyond excited to marry you. Thank you for being my best friend through it all :)
