Free therapy

 Fun fact about me, I started therapy at the ripe young age of eight years old- so I am basically an expert. I talked a little bit about this in an old post (linked right here) and it is something I have been able to appreciate in these latter years of my life. 

Since I've already done it once before, I am not going to deep dive into exactly how my anxiety affects me- but rather what tools I find myself using on a daily basis (and share them with y'all at no extra cost). A lot of these were formed so early in my childhood, that they come like second nature to me. It's honestly a blessing considering how much I really do need them. I feel lucky to have established such resources when I was so impressionable so that I am now able to rely on them as a crutch instead of shy away from my daily anxieties...

Let's start with right when I wake up. 

I don't think there has been one day in my whole existence where I didn't wake up with unease coursing through my whole body. I always start the day with a racing heart and sunken stomach. But I have gotten used to it. As soon as my eyes open for the day, my brain is already 23 steps ahead, dissecting and preparing for the day ahead. And not just an "ooo what do I have going on today?". It's a lot more of "here is a list of 437 things that could go wrong today, and this is how I could maybe avoid it." Which leads me to spiral spiral spiral until my day feels like a storm cloud ready to rain down on me. But lucky for me, a very wise woman (my mother) once told me this motto that I use for myself when times get like this; "life's a cinch by the inch, but it is hard by the yard." I use this to help lessen the load I face daily, by taking it in small steps. My anxiety can't freak out at me if all I am focused on is getting out of bed first. One task at a time. It helps narrow the things I could let myself worry about and makes it easier to talk myself out of spiraling! That linked with deep breathing (in for five, hold for five, out for five, two normal breaths, repeat 5x) makes life just that much easier.

Now let's move on to a little later in the day.

For me, constants are a huge helper. Finding ways to implement stability can kind of give a feeling of control that settles nerves about other things. Constants such as songs you know and love, a specific breakfast you start the day with, having a routine with skincare or routine for your opening shift etc. Being able to rely on something can support a lot more than you'd think. I use songs as my biggest constant. My poor husband is seriously the best when it comes to this. He doesn't mind that I play the same few songs on repeat for months at a time, he just learns the words and sings along with me. 
Now be wise, I am not advising you to live the same day over and over again, or to never experience anything new. That would just make life unbearable. Instead, use these as a little umph of control to help support you to be able to experience life to its fulness. 

Time to unwind for the end of my day. 

For me, and I know a lot of other people, anxiety loves to creep in late at night- right when falling asleep. Counting how many hours of sleep you're going to get, thinking about something embarrassing that happened 6 years ago, etc. Seriously- the worst. This happened all the time when I was a kid, made me miserable. And I remember talking to my therapist about it- and she gave me a challenge. A challenge to get up and out of bed when I'm experiencing these panicked thoughts. She said it would help my mind separate anxiety from laying down in bed. If you do an action enough times, it starts to become habit and muscle memory. Same with your mind. If you become anxious just about every time you're about to fall asleep, your brain will recognize the pattern and make associations and turn it into second nature. You'll subconsciously begin to connect the thought of laying down in bed to a panic attack. 
So, to fix this, you have to get your mind to separate the two. When the anxiety starts, get up and out of bed right away. Experience those feelings in a new place, and maybe start a new activity. Even if it's the middle of the night. Walk across the room and start journaling, or start meditating, just anything to both calm your mind and remind your brain that your bed is a place of rest- not a place of panic.

If you are able to push yourself to practice these exercises, the strength to get through your anxiety will grow. I promise that. Things don't have to be so scary all the time! And honestly you guys, if you've never been to therapy, I strongly suggest you do. You may not feel that anything is "wrong with you", and really there doesn't need to be in order to profit off of the process of therapy. If you have been thinking about it, this is your sign!!! The relationship and understanding you have with yourself is something that can always be improved and should most definitely be prioritized.